she-Ra.

People say they keep it real, but oftentimes there are nuances to that. Oftentimes we don't say what we mean, we keep secrets, we lie even to ourselves, we bite our tongues, we try to see the good even when directly confronted with the bad. Self-hating actions cloaked in nobility. We feel real good when we get all Joan of Arc with it. Until that light starts to burn up all the chaff we thought we discarded. The cauldron bubbles and cups run over.

Shit can get real messy if you don't have your clean-up routine down pat.

I used to scoff when folks acted with surprise over the feelings I'd share with them.

"I didn't know you felt that way."

"Um...what? Are you really that obtuse, or am I just being a typical Capricorn and judging you based on my own personal standards?"

So yeah, when in 3d mode it's easy to say, how could you not know? How could you not know that you were hurting me, that I felt neglected and/or disrespected...cast aside?

But really...how could they know if you didn't tell them?

The others appear somewhat flummoxed at times with the wide open nature of my now. And I know that not everyone is down with this new program I'm running but...

Iown really give a fuck. When it comes to attending to Self I can get quite divinely narcissistic. Not at all above tossing some slight chaos into the mix by way of wordplay. Whatever it takes to get my release. My voice holds the power to collapse duality because after the openness, comes the knowing that it's really all good. All the roles played up to this point have served their purpose.

And now it's time for something completely different.

This is that nu Nu I was talking about and I gotta tell you...the HeShe in me ain't really up for no old bullshit. Half-stepping and fetching for others' pieces of mind is not allowed. This game is only for the fittest; those ready to move beyond survival into real Life. All relationships must come correct or be caught in my downstream as I move up.

Currently I am unstoppable.

I know I sound really fire right now but trust that this morning I was watery as hell. I sure as heck didn't want to man up and say what I did. But when I saw that two of cups reversed I knew there was an energy not being expressed. My universe demands that all equations be balanced for the I to truly flow.

Sheeeit...these days I'm so ready to move that I'll get gully about any damn thing blocking my evolution. But real extra smooth with it too cause you know...

I do it with love. Now. Whether the outers recognize my innards remains to be seen.

Movement will occur regardless.

Posted by Lisa at March 25, 2008 04:37 PM