"Relationship energy may be shifting into new territory for you, but you can be so concerned with how things appear that you may miss something significant. It's most important that you pay attention to the subtle clues coming from others, especially those emotionally close to you. Allow a loved one to nurture you for a change."
On.point. Funny I read that after I'd had my little talky talk. Coming from someone who's typically the adviser, I cannot tell you how good it feels to be the one letting off a bit o' steam from time to time. I gained a different perspective that calmed me. The thing is, you have to find an impartial party that doesn't have some sideline hating gene in their body, because they will either subconsciously or deliberately throw even more salt into the wound. I know y'all know what I'm talking about.
I'm finding that one of the greatest sources of inner power is the ability to let go. I don't keep anyone in my life that don't want to be kept...forreal. I'm at the point now where I can respect one's decision to exit stage right, allow myself the humanness of missing them and occasionally being highly annoyed at the UTTER GALL...but yet and I still - I keep it moving.
"I don't expect anything from you." I've said this to people before and they've treated it like an insult. I think they believe it translates to "I don't expect anything from you cause I know you ain't a bit of shit!"
Not so. You have to learn to give up expectations simply because it relieves the pain of disappointment. And as I mentioned before, how is it that you have all these rules and regs that the other person knows nothing about? Now me I do have boundaries and things I won't tolerate and blah blah, but I will typically let folks know that up front. That's different though. What I mean is boxing people in and harboring all these secret desires for certain types of behavior. THAT is what gets you into trouble.
Life gets bajiggedy enough without you adding to the misery quotient with your own fuckery. So yeah...take heed mfs!
Posted by Lisa at July 15, 2007 08:53 PM