You know...it is all too easy to get caught up in someone else's bullshit. We all have those buttons that can be pushed, and some people just have an innate ability to push em very well. But me...well I ain't really trying to do it like that these days. If you talk it you must live it, and I've become accustomed to a different way of life. I'm just...somewhere else, you know?
I don't know if you feel it, but I do. That even as things begin to unfold in a good way for me, other aspects of life out there are unraveling. Chaos impending. So yes while patience is warranted when it comes to attaining one's goals, there's this sense that...time's a-wasting. Perhaps the matrix will be dismantled?
I dunno. And I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer but um yeah...y'all better get y'all shit straight. While you can.
I was rearranging the million plus items on my dresser and somehow upended my deck of tarot cards. They all spilled facedown, save for two.
Ok, I know a message when I see one.
I looked at the cards - The Lovers and the Eight of Cups. Choice. And despite the fact that my ex called me last night, I knew it had nothing to do with things on the relationship front. Anybody with eyes can see that as long as my head and heart lie in their current position, there will be no checking for new dudes. No...it was going to be a fork in another kind of road.
So I sat and waited...knowing the issue would present itself. And it did. And it's some career-oriented shit. And I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do. Stay the course or grab another opportunity to stack and thusly divide my energies?
I 'm justifiably antsy. I've got to ponder this shit because...well I've veered in the wrong direction several times in my lifespan; and trust me it wasn't onto the yellow-brick road. It was more like the road that serial killers and those of that ilk favor. Some shit I had drag myself away from broken and bleeding...all glad to be alive and whatnot. Clearly I would like to avoid a similar situation happening from like...here on out.
But...we shall have to see won't we? Mmmhmm...see what Miss Lisa can be about.
Posted by Lisa at February 1, 2007 12:57 AM