The Big 3-0

I've looked forward to being 30 since I was 18, so I could never understand why some people act like it's the absolute end of the world. I've always had the feeling that the thirties would somehow just suit me better...being an old soul and all. Even so, I don't think I could have ever predicted the fundamental changes that the last year of my twenties would bring.

2006 was...some shit. At the beginning, I had the feeling that a lot of things would begin to manifest for me, but yet and still I was surprised. Which I shouldn't have been because...well I've learned that if you want a thing badly enough, it will happen, whether you're truly ready for it or not.

Chile. A sister had to pull herself by the bootstraps and put in some serious work - internally and externally. I learned that I had more strength and will than I ever imagined. I lost major weight, taught myself some new things, recovered like gangbusters from having my heart torn out the frame. I blossomed, homie.

For the first time I feel grown. There's a steel in my spine that was never there before, as if some all important final piece slipped into place. Before my confidence was composed of maybe 3 parts bravado and bluster, but now I'm all self-assurance. Hard times don't seem as bad when you know there are better things right around the corner; and more importantly when you've located a fount of strength within self.

But let me add that family and friends are just as essential to my sense of well-being. I learned that it's ok to lean occasionally on those strong enough to hold you up. And push you.

So what's the plan going into my 30s? Well I want to ascend, make money, get leaner and more fit, find a new home for myself and the kiddies, and continue to cement the fact in these misc. dudes' minds that I am not some lil fallback chick that they can set up for the okie doke.

Cause you know...the menfolks will try you, no matter how old you get!

Other than that? Well, we'll just have to see, won't we?

Posted by Lisa at January 4, 2007 08:48 PM