Get OFF The Tiddies!

I used to think I shouldn't post everyday because mofos would have too much to read and they wouldn't want to go back a day or two to read archives. That was back when I smoked a lot of weed and obviously kept forgetting that this isn't about them. Besides, if you really loved me, you'd read more than this entry. Or has our entire relationship been a lie? *eyeing you suspiciously*

I think there's something inherently wrong with a mufucka that only talks about shit they see on tv. And I'm talking bout all the time. Nothing else. No discussion about current events, daily activities, random thoughts, color and length of turds, nothing. Somehow, some way, everything ties in with some television program that they've seen. I'm quite afraid that they cannot formulate a valid thought or opinion without the assistance of the remote control. Psshtt. It's no wonder it's called the boob tube.

If you are a man over the age of 21 who is still lovingly ensconced in your mom's pubes then I feel compelled to tell you to: a) do us a favor and slit your wrists (downward) raht nah or b) get a set of balls and man up, you weak, moronic jerkwad!

Not sure what being a mama's boy entails? Welp, if your mom has any power to sway your romantic relationships one way or the other, you are a mama's boy. If your mama has a key to your apartment and can come and go as she pleases, you are a mama's boy. If you consult your mom about every gotdamn thing, from whether or not you should take a morning or evening dump to what socks match your blue shirt, you are indeed a mama's boy. If you interrupt sex to talk to your mom on the phone, you are a mama's boy. And if you have ever, EVER thought that your mama was FINE at any point in her lifetime...woowee lawd jeebus. Man, just hand me that dull paring knife over there. Imma slit yo fuckin wrists for you! And ya throat too for good measure.

I have never been able to abide by these Oedipus-complex having mufuckas. Something about them just makes my coochie juice curdle. Don't get me wrong, now. Family ties are important as hell, and I feel a man that loves and respects his mother will treat me the same. BUT there's a difference between that and letting your mother run your life. I feel that if you want to be a man, take a seemingly dominant position in this society, AND get props for that shit, then you might want to be able to make important decisions without picking up the phone and asking mama if it's ok.

I was looking at Ursher's new video, today and thought to myself, "Damn that mufucka can dayunnnnce!" That shit looks great...when put in the proper context. But please believe I would be highly upset if I was dancing with some cat in the club and he bust out with some semi-choreographed wild Dance Fever fuckery. I would so turn around and say, "Nigga, sit yo ass DOWN!" I mean damn, if I'm dancing and letting you receive surreptitious brushes of my booty against your crotch, then the least you could do is be still!! Y'all men have it easy...all you gotta do is move a little and keep in time to the music. Don't be getting all extra with it! Stay within your boundaries. Ugh. Otherwise know that uncaring bitches like me will most assuredly be pointing at your dumb ass and laughing.

Man, I was going to speak on something entirely different when I started this post. And now I'm too tired to get into that. Oh well. Gotta go where the flow leads me.

Later.